I can only feel myself living in this world by blog now. It’s like a letter to prove that I’m still exists, still breathing, and still alive to contribute some pollution to this world. I’m struggling in my life each and everyday, trying to live up here. Felt very stressful these few days. I can feel it by the lack of beauty sleep and some weird dream I had these days. Can’t fall asleep when I’m going to bed because somehow my brain was too excited, my heart bits like a running horse, and until I didn’t notice it, it takes after few hours for me to deeply fall in sleep. But my sleep never last longer, even though I slept at the midnight I still woke up in the early morning at around 5 o’clock. Not even when I was too exhausted with so many activities and my eyes were like too tired to open it, I still can’t wonder into my Lala-land (smirk). Maybe because the weather was too warm for me to sleep, or maybe because, because I’m old and having these old people symptoms right now. Like my dad does now, he always wakes up at six o’clock in any days (including Sunday) without an alarm clock. Haha! (Not funny Jason!) Maybe because my day to a new semester is coming soon, that’s why I am so suffer now. Damn it! Yea, I had my plan this time, and I’m going to stick to it till the end of semester. Hmm… I’m quite enjoying this sweet moment of I’m-all-alone time now! My mind felt so peaceful and calm with the music running into my brain with the right frequency. Anyway, it had been a sport days for me this week because I had done various type of sports with my friends and it feels so insane. I went swimming with my old pals on Wednesday; unlike any other swimming day we had every week, this was the last time we had in this semester break. Everyone was kind of gloomy due to that reason because we really had lots of joyful moment at the pool. And I can feel it from everyone’s conversation and some awkward feeling I had when the music of ‘kiss the rain’ played in the car. It has been so great to be able to find some friends to go swimming with me again. It means a lot to me and I always look forward to each swimming time we had. I like swimming a lot. People who know me well knew that. Swimming makes me feel like a fish. A carefree fish which can swim in the water with no problems bugging in his mind and his little wonderful world. It’s another alternative way for me to drag myself out of this world of chaos besides than playing guitar. And also a great sport too because it’s the only sport that u doesn’t sweat for it! But I’m glad li ling mastered the art of swimming before she goes back to her University. She really amazes me with just a month I taught her on how to swim. According to her, snorkeling at Redang Island last time really helps her. Well I don’t know about that, but I do know I’m getting better in giving free swimming class to people now. Haha! Nevertheless, I played badminton and ping pong with my old pals too. Then we go jogging, oh ya… I brought a new basketball for myself not long ago, so besides jogging we play basketball at Setia Alam Park too. On the other hand, I also spend my week playing bowling with my bros; they just love bowling so much! But they also crazy in watching movie like I do. That’s why I often go to the cinema with them. Well, indirectly they’re my new ‘couple’ for movies now. Haha! (its sound so wrong!) Sometimes we go ‘yamcha’(coffee) even though we just hang out few days ago and were out of topic with each other. But because we’re in the same shoe for some reason, we still go out at night; watching football matches to pass our boring time together-World cup is hot for everybody now what! Sometimes I just felt like I had the coolest friends with me, they make me feel so proud of them once a while! Maybe they’re not the best people in the world and they might get pretty annoying at time, but they’re the one who constantly makes me feel happy when I'm moody, be there for me when I’m alone, share their jokes with me when I’m bored, and most importantly keep me in one piece when my entire world falls apart and everything. How simple was that but yet those are the very important things that make them so awesome to me; Some group of people that I belong with/in. I don’t need any complicated things in my life and they are exactly the kind of friendship I cherish. After 5 to 10 years, who knows where will us end up with/in. Maybe some of us probably in a relationship by the time, some of us migrated to other country for certain reason, some of us settled in a marriage and have kids and some other possibilities that we never figure out in life happens changed the friendship. Life is full of surprises! And I believe everything has its own 'expired date'. To be total selfish to myself, I hope time will slow down for us now so that we are able to enjoy every moment we spend together as a group of best friend. Let every minute we spend is full with enjoyment and laughter. And may the tears we ever drop for each other be the tear of joy not sadness. Most of the time when I go out with friends, I enjoy watching lovely couples around me. They always attract my attention because the way they treat each other was so sweet and caring it makes my heart melt, either when I’m at the shopping malls, in cinema, outdoor or indoor. Secretly I will stalk at them and bless them with best wishes. That’s how I do. Do you know why?! Because they're not just some old sweet disgusting couple, but they're also their best friend to each other. So cherish your partner when you still have one with u! (take note future Jason) :)
P.S. just hold on to that moment, the answers would come and the clouds would clear and the complicated would become simply and the bizarre would become ordinary.
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