‘Baggages’

Does u believe in everyone has these ‘baggage’ carried with them everyday in life..? Think deeply... Sure do, its part of the life and everyone has it! At least ONE baggage, you just need to look pass it. There’s in-love-with-Ex baggage, being-to-nice baggage, left-by-the-alter baggage, family-issue baggage, always-too-awesome-keep-on-rejecting-people baggage and betrayed-by-friends-cant-trust-everyone baggage and so much more that you can name it all day. So, what’s my baggage? I think, only god can answer it for me; maybe that’s one of the criteria a soul mate should have, to be able to give you a hand with those heavy and tough stuffs you had gone through in your pervious life. Willing to accept who you are and what you did before bumping into them. Yea, it’s not an easy task or mission for anyone to do this. But it’s not an impossible one if you really are ‘the one’ for that person. Like anything else, it’s our responsibility to make our soul mate feel better by lighten their burden. Not to say minimize the pain but to reduce or cover it with loves and cares. It’s nice and sweet to do for the person you love. Today is father’s day; like any other day, I don’t purposely treat my dad ‘specially’ nice. Because for me, you should cherish and treat your dad good everyday. (At least try to! :D) Father is like a very important person who brings back food to home. Every family member is counting on him. Without him, they’ll die in hunger. Like those old-age people, men always go hunting for the family. Tonight I was at home waiting my dad to ‘da pao’ (deliver) dinner for me despite of that this feeling suddenly came to me so naturally. Haha! Maybe I was too hungry that time because I just ate some delicious tosei and eggs for lunch, and that was like 8 long hours ago. My dad, sometimes he really talks too much in the house. Like the older he gets, the more nagger he becomes. And my mom is like those very impatient women at times that you can’t mess with her. Then you get the picture, it will cause a massive argument when two people couldn’t tolerant with each other. Nowadays I notice there’s a problem in my family. My parents, besides working on weekdays, they don’t have any other things to do during their weekends. They’re just depend their free time on those dramas that I got from my friends and sent it to pen drive and watch it through TV using some high definition media player, and that’s not pretty at all. You see, when they’re not watching drama, they’ll bug me, so much, like asking me who I’m chatting with in the computer room, or who am I sms-ing with and all that! Or they’ll go online chatting with my brother when they had enough of me, then nothing else they can do already. Seriously, I want my parents to have their real own life back! Enjoy other things besides then just watching dramas or treating me like a small kid. Yes, I do like to have their concerns but I still need some space for my own… Deep down my heart, I feel so bad and wrong watching my parent live with not enjoyments. Like they have just lived their life under the shadow of their sons. That’s the reason I brought Romeo into our life, into our family because I was too afraid that will happen. And it’s actually happening now! I know maybe I was being over-reacted or sophisticate over this issue but I just don’t know. Anyway, Happy Father’s Day to my dad! And to those people who grow up in single mother or had lost their father, do wish your mother happy father’s day too because they do play the fatherhood part in your life too!... Cheer Jason!

P.S. Not everything went great as we planed. But life has plenty of good parts, is the rough part that makes us thankful we have people to share with.

One liter of Tears

How much time does a person needs to fill in a bottle with a liter of tears?! That’s not a question actually. Its courage, love, patient and determination for a person to achieve what they want in their life. True enough, life still got lots of things to do besides than relationship, so don’t waste it Jason! There will be lot of distraction in the process, just like a football match, when you’re in the striker position, lots of defenders will stop you from shooting in the goal therefore you need to be more than just prepared for whatever things that’s came against you. There might not be any fair and square game exactly like what's in a real life. It’s very hard sometimes but that’s what makes us so different and unique from anyone. Most normal human being will feel lost, stress out, or even feel like giving up on their dream at time. Doesn’t matter in your studies, careers, relationships or all stuff like that. All those feeling will keep on hammering you with no sympathy and you just wish all that will ends as fast as possible or the fastest the better. But I always believe in there’ll be a better tomorrow. And bear with all the hard time I had with minimum complains and groans because when you’re not talking, you’re thinking! (Its takes a lot not to say so much actually) So yeah, nobody likes those negative feelings. Nobody likes to be hurt by others! Today I went shopping alone. Long time I didn’t do such thing already it feels kind of nice and fresh for doing it again. I had brought a watch that cost around 450 bucks (after discount) for my dad. It takes me hardship to buy this watch I hope he will love it when I present it to him on the father’s day. Besides that, I also brought a set of tie and cufflink for my old pal who’s going to turn 21 years old this coming Saturday. Hope he will like the present too. Oh, I also brought myself a new grey colour tie. Haha! Cannot be not buying myself something when everybody got their own gift rite?! :P Met a junior from high school while looking for my dad’s present. Surprisingly that sales girl at the City Chain Shop still recognizes me by mentioning I was the former president for student council club. (Honestly, I had totally forgotten who she was) Then we started to chat while i ask her stuffs about the watch. It feels great when someone still can remember you after so many years.























P.S. I feel better now. I found time can heal most everthing.

Kiss the rain

My life used to be a perfect one. I have my girl friend with me, I have great friends, and my studies were always in high achievement. I enjoy playing all sorts of sports like swimming, badminton and all that. When I was down or feeling bored, I’ll lead my guitar to play me comfortable music to relax my mind and drag me out from reality and help me stop thinking for a few minutes of my life. I like taekwondo because I had started learning it since I was in primary four but that’s an old time story of mine already. Yea, I’m a black belt and I enjoy sparing. Blah blah blah.. And I do like to read story books when it comes to my leisure time. I mostly enjoy Cecelia’s type of literary. I have lot of her collections. :P Sound like I’m a very noble person huh! Haha! Oh, 4gotten to introduce my family members here. I have a lovely warm family. My only brother who was just two years younger than me undertaking mass communication in ECU University in Aus, my parents whom always support my current life give my everything I need, and never negelect Romeo the house dog. (There will be lot of story of him because he’s so dearly to me and also to my family) However, at the age of 21 years old, things had been quite different now. I shall start my story a year ago with me ‘grieving’ over my break up with my 1st love. Indeed, hard time for me. I don’t even know how to spend my semester break that time so I went to work as a waiter at Neway Company. Then I met a sweet girl in my university, named Angeline*. She was a fine girl with excellant language, loves to read story books, share every story of her life with me, In other words, we were quite open with each other. I can still remember the last time I brought her souvenir (my favourite chocolate) when I got back from a vacation in Langkawi Island; and she gave me some expensive body shampoo that she dun wants and ‘ba kua’ that her senior gave her. I really smell like a green apple each time I use the body shampoo. At first I hate that smell so much but I was kind of getting over with it at the end of the day. We share all the songs and movies that we like. We text each other day and night doesnt matter anyone of us were asleep or not. Having someone to bug at anytime is the nicest and sweetest things a person can get in their life especially with those who just broke up in a relationship. I cherish every moment we had although we never actually meet and look into each other eyes before. But then the friendship didn’t last for long, we have language and religion problems according to what I feel. Although I don’t mind all of that stuff but not her. I had two major arguments with her and the 2nd one was few days ago. I don't think we’ll back together this time. Then there’s her best friend Inessa* who I’m close with too when I put an end with Angeline*. She told me that Inessa* was kind of into me now so I might as well give her the attention she wants, or give it a try maybe she’ll be the soul mate I’m always looking for. Things went well for d 1st week, she share everything with me, and vice versa. We spend our quality time together but till today, she changed her attitude towards me after I sent her one of my picture that I posting handsomely at Broga Hill with some flirty text message in it. She asked me not to keep in touch with her FOREVER because I’m very annoying to her. After listened to all the explanation from me, she just chose a few correct responds from her little words file to reply me. I don’t think I had done anything wrong here. Now I have been deeply hurt my two girls whom are best friend. I had learnt my valuable lessons in life now. I quit my holiday’s job working as a promoter at AEON selling kid’s clothes (KIKO) today due to a serious argument I had with the head of the guard. There’s no reason I state the whole story down here but I don’t know why I’m so brave to stand up for myself that time. And I don’t understand why I even start this damn stupid fucking boring promoter job. Honestly, I know the reason. I start the job when I broke up with Angeline*, I thought I can use this opportunity to reduce the pain in my heart. I quit the job because I hate it so much and that time I just broke with Inessa* so I grab this opportunity to pick a fight with the guard and stop working too. Lame excuse isn’t it but that’s wholly true. Now I’m officially unhooked from both of them. I guess that’s the best ending for everyone of us. I don’t belong to either one of them. (Hope this time I’m not wrong) I think it’s the best time for me to back to myself now. My studies has been dropping tremendously, I’m suck in dealing with friendship, I’m a quitter at work, I’m lack of confident and trust in myself and I'm still not sure anymore worst thing is coming to me to make my life more miserable or not. Right now, I’m at d lowest point of my life. Everything doesn’t go smoothly for me. And I start to wonder am I going to live my life like this now and forever?! So, you had known me and what my current life is like. Most people will start their blog with great introduction, with positive thinking, and all stuff like that but not me. I think I’m going to screw my 1st blog for once. Maybe one day when I looked back, I know I've been in this kind of moment in my life before. Remind me that I’m not always that perfect and awesome all the time. Haha! It’s for you XXX, I shall start cherish every moment of my life by writing it down here, I’ll do my best to kept my promise. Not break it until the end of my life.

P.S. it takes long time2 build up trust, but it can be crush overnight; plunge back to reality Jason!